Last summer, I interned for a nonprofit fashion magazine that worked on small business integration in Indianapolis. I’m not a particularly trendy person. However, because of this brief job, I’m far too confident in thinking that I know what’s trending.
There are a lot of current trends, mostly micro-trends – fast fashion clothes with short closet lives – that I don’t like.
Those fluffy bag things, like those of Tiktok/Depop
I hate these bags so much. They feel weird on my hands. It’s akin to the feeling of dry, winter-worn skin rubbing against a static blanket. The inside of them is still rough and they look like they are about to fall apart.
This is a big fast fashion item, and they fit the bill: cheaply made and hastily designed.
I really like to wear practical shoes – I’m a big white Reebok girl. Jelly shoes are impractical. Unfortunately they are kinda cute but give me blisters. My feet sweat so much when I wear them – a slip and slide moment that I don’t like. The shoes can be cute but they’re also a bit too Polly Pocket style for my taste so I wouldn’t personally wear them – but they can be styled well.
My main jelly shoe hate is their 2022 version. It’s a watered down version of the glassy classic from the 90s, and I don’t like big brands reusing this style. It seems naïve, especially when a luxury brand like Gucci starts releasing tacky shoes.
Tights as a top
Listen, I like to reduce, reuse and recycle as much as the next girl. However, cutting out sheer black tights and attaching them to a top isn’t exactly my definition of edgy fashion. In all honesty, it’s bold. It’s innovative. Unlike a lot of the trends I talk about, it’s not fast fashion that’s a good start, and I think it’s interesting.
For me, my biggest issues are the sheerness of the tights, which I think can lend itself to a bit of slippage, and the practicality of the garment. You probably won’t wear tights as a top anywhere other than in bars – which isn’t a problem – but the tights could easily get ripped from dancing or sweaty from the atmosphere.
Swirly patterned jeans
I have a specific vendetta against this style of pants. My main issue with these pants is that they just don’t work in any setting. They’re a little flashy for going to class, but they’re not pretty enough for a dinner party. They don’t stretch so the pattern won’t mold to your body. It sits stiff and rigid against your leg. Likewise, jeans are objectively not comfortable, especially women’s cut jeans. With these patterns, it makes the pants even stiffer than it already is.
Also, these jeans are a micro-trendy moment. I hate microtrends – I could write a whole article about them specifically. Microtrends are bad for the environment due to the turnaround time for the wearer. Fast fashion brands traditionally deliver micro-trends, like sweater vests, tennis skirts and this cowgirl tee. Swirly patterned jeans are just another micro-trend destined for the trash.
Last but not least is the horror that inspired this column: transition lenses – prescription glasses that tint into sunglasses when you go out. To put it blatantly, they are ugly. I think they are bad for the environment. This is factually incorrect. You could show me stats that show they’re actually great for the environment, and I literally don’t care.
Also, who voluntarily wears a transition lens but a child? Are you really going to walk in after being out and wait for your glasses to come back? It’s silly, in my opinion.
Please take my personal preferences with a grain of salt. If you have a fluffy Depop bag and you’re a cool hottie, that’s cool, I really don’t care. I don’t really judge people for wearing these items, but rather hate the items as separate entities. Likewise, I wore camo pants last week, so I’m just as bad.
Curren Gauss (she/her) is a junior with a major in English with a minor in dramaturgy. She hopes to one day have a job.